What are you going to do when the Rapture comes?

[Notta]

This has been a source of conversation for my entire family since my deconversion in 2000.

I plan on stealing the car of my dreams, living in some ritzy beach house in Malibu or Miami Beach, and raiding liquor stores for expensive hooch.

What do you plan on doing when Christians rise up to heaven when Christ returns?

[Christina]

I want stained glass. Lots of it.

[Lisa0315]

Falling on my face before a Holy and Just God.

Lisa

[Anne]

When the rapture comes---

it'd be same old same old. No one is going to heaven. There'd be some loophole to keep the place empty.

[Joykins]

I don't believe in the rapture but if a bunch of people disappeared suddenly...

I'd probably take their stuff. :tin:

[Puck]

I plan on stealing the car of my dreams, living in some ritzy beach house in Malibu or Miami Beach, and raiding liquor stores for expensive hooch.


Notta, I somehow don't think those in Malibu or Miami Beach are gonna get taken up to heaven. You could lay claim to the double wide on the edge of town with the mini van and all the cheap beer stashed in the garage. :D

It ain't never gonna happen, but I'll play. I'll enjoy going to town and not seeing every other car with a fish sticker on it. I'll be glad for the break ole ma earth will get from having less resources used up. And our gay friends can all get married, finally, so I will enjoy the explosion of delightful weddings. All the churches can be used to house the homeless and as distribution centers for food and clothing, for local health centers or whatever need may need filling. Unlike what the buildings are used for now, which is simply lip service to helping others and more about being seen at the 'right' church.

/rant

[JamesBannon]

Tell "God" he can go take a flying fuck at a rolling doughnut!

[Notta]

Notta, I somehow don't think those in Malibu or Miami Beach are gonna get taken up to heaven. You could lay claim to the double wide on the edge of town with the mini van and all the cheap beer stashed in the garage. :D
Thanks for destroying my happy dream, Puck. Now I'm gonna go out back to my aluminum shed, sit in my webbed lawn chair, and weep into my box wine. :drunk:

(Maybe those in Malibu or Miami Beach will die in the first war between the Anti-Christ and the Risen Christ, and THEN I can get their houses!)

[Alethias]

This has been a source of conversation for my entire family since my deconversion in 2000.

I plan on stealing the car of my dreams, living in some ritzy beach house in Malibu or Miami Beach, and raiding liquor stores for expensive hooch.

What do you plan on doing when Christians rise up to heaven when Christ returns?Probably depends on a lot of things. Is it really what a lot of modern-day christians think it is? A lot of christians prior to the mid 1800's didn't have the same concept of rapture that modern christians have. If it is what christians think it is, when is it happening, and will its effect be what christians expect? I guess all of those would influence my choice.

What if god made me in such a way to not believe in him? if that is the case, I'm living out his will for my life by being convinced of his non-existence, and I would be violating his plan for me by believing in him. So were there to be a rapture, what would be the appropriate response for someone like me, that was specifically designed and built by god for the specific intent and purpose of disbelieving in his existence?

I'm guessing the appropriate response to the non-existence of a non-event that I don't believe in is no response at all, but I admit I could be mistaken.

I suspect that your family would be just as displeased with my answer as my family was, hehe(they were horrified and there was dead silence for awhile).

[Anne]

We have a friend who was rejoicing about the rapture.

It meant all the Christians were going to heaven and the pagans were too.

heaven being the earth to pagans...

[RBH]

I myself think the Rapture came in 1947, and all those who are still waiting for it were Left Behind and don't know it. Yet. :D

[Stout Drinker]

I'll be getting a lapdance.

[Jobar]

Falling on my face before a Holy and Just God.

Lisa


Wait, wait. I thought you were supposed to be "taken up into the air." If that's the case, what are you going to fall on? I mean, if you're just floating there, won't you just do a forward roll, until you straighten out? Don't you think that would look sorta silly?

[Eudaimonist]

Thank the space aliens for taking the fundies away. I am sure that they will be happy enough on the New Earth serving their new masters. Good slaves are ever so hard to find.


eudaimonia,

Mark

[Ray Moscow]

I don't believe in the rapture but if a bunch of people disappeared suddenly...

I'd probably take their stuff. :tin:

Yeah, me, too.

I'd start by taking all the porn left behind by the Christians.

[Puck]

It would be crappy porn though, Ray. Sometimes, literally. I've noticed christains are into some strange stuff. Drugs and boys and diapers and scat. The more fundy they are, the more twisted they seem to be. :D

[Lisa0315]

Wait, wait. I thought you were supposed to be "taken up into the air." If that's the case, what are you going to fall on? I mean, if you're just floating there, won't you just do a forward roll, until you straighten out? Don't you think that would look sorta silly?

Fine. Then, at the first chance I get...

[Magdlyn]

Hey, I like drugs and boys.

And a tortured bloody lover.


*kisses her cross pendant*

[Danhalen]

I so badly want to sell rapture insurance.

[Notta]

Someone really knew how to cash in on Rapture-Ready folks:

You've Been Left Behind e-mail service (http://www.youvebeenleftbehind.com/index-3.html)

[Jobar]

I remember when that first got started!

I seldom hear anything about the hijinks at RR anymore. Time was when the craziness that place radiated seemed to be nearing critical mass, but I haven't seen any new insanities from them for a while now.

Back when I was on the committee writing the TR Charter, someone posted the rule set those people use. Barking mad, I tell you...

[Uthgar the Brazen]

Four words:

So long, public decency!

[Brother Daniel]

^ ^ Except that we'll still have the Muslims among us.

With no Christians to counterbalance them. :eek:

[Uthgar the Brazen]

They don't balance them now.

[Brother Daniel]

You're right, wrt certain variables (such as the one to which you have already alluded). But I don't relish the idea of having the proportion of Muslims in the world suddenly increase dramatically.

[Uthgar the Brazen]

Hmmmm...

We'll make it a "rapture for all well-populated religious groups" day. Put a coupon in the paper or something.

[Barbarian]

You're right, wrt certain variables (such as the one to which you have already alluded). But I don't relish the idea of having the proportion of Muslims in the world suddenly increase dramatically.I don't think 144,000 virgin Jewish males will make that much of a difference.

[Brianna]

TL;DR

I am going to rejoyce cause I will have my planet to myself for once.

[Goldie]

Thanks for destroying my happy dream, Puck. Now I'm gonna go out back to my aluminum shed, sit in my webbed lawn chair, and weep into my box wine. :drunk:

(Maybe those in Malibu or Miami Beach will die in the first war between the Anti-Christ and the Risen Christ, and THEN I can get their houses!)

I'll get drunk with Notta and have a frickin good time!:D

[Puck]

Sorry 'bout that, Notta. I'll get drunk with y'all, though.

[Loren Pechtel]

Probably dropping dead of shock that it actually exists.

[Christina]

If they take my partner and leave me behind I'm going to live on peanut butter, banana and honey sandwiches and and brownies and get fat as a house.

[Puck]

^^^

Yummy.