"Religion is like..."

[Jobar]

What's your favorite metaphor to describe religion?

One of my own is "Religion is often like an evil which wears a mask of good."

While you're free to add a touch of humor here, I'm looking more for serious ones.

[DMB]

I'm pretty bitter about religion, having had it shoved down my throat for most of my formative years. And although things have changed in Europe to the extnt that far more people are openly non-religious, the religions maintain much of their grip on power, out of all proportion to the number of serious adherents.

So the "shoving down my throat" idea brings to mind Mrs Squeers in Nicholas Nickelby forcing the boys at Dotheboys Hall to swallow brimstone and treacle.

Yes. I think brimstone and treacle will do very well as an image of forced religion.

[BWE]

religion is like intentional ignorance.

[Matty]

i've always liked "God is like Santa Claus or the tooth fairy but for grown ups",

Its nicely condescending of the intelligence and wishful thinking needed to subscribe to such a stupid fucking idea, but non offensive enough in language (if not intent) that you can drop it in just about any conversation.

[MattShizzle]

I liked the one I heard saying religious war is people killing each other over who has the better imaginary friend.

[Free in Freeport]

Religion is like a suppository - it irritates the shit out of me.

Religion is like a condom - it gives you a sense of security while you're getting screwed.

Religion is like gravity - it sucks.

Life without religion is like a fish without a bicycle.

Religion is like underwear - Everyone thinks you have to have it, but nobody can give a good reason why.

[Rie]

BWE said it best re my viewpoint on religion. And I would add that 'embracing' religion is like asking for shackles to be put on every human bodily natural reaction. To willingly blindfold yourself is the ultimate sin!

[Politesse]

An opinion on religion is like a fart; everyone thinks that everyone else's stinks.

[MattShizzle]

Actually religion stinks much more than that. More like a toilet that's been used daily and hasn't been flushed in 2000 years.

[BWE]

Actually religion stinks much more than that. More like a toilet that's been used daily and hasn't been flushed in 2000 years.
I dunno. It's still true in many places that if you discover yourself totally down and out, any building with a large cross on it will be a source of some comfort. The price is not monetary usually. That's not a total waste. If someone does that and only requires that their own baggage be heard, it's not all bad.

[Monad]

Religion is like a condom - it gives you a [false] sense of security while you're getting screwed.

It's a holy condom

[kennyc]

Religion is like a suppository - it irritates the shit out of me.

Religion is like a condom - it gives you a sense of security while you're getting screwed.

Religion is like gravity - it sucks.

Life without religion is like a fish without a bicycle.

Religion is like underwear - Everyone thinks you have to have it, but nobody can give a good reason why.

:D

Religion is belief without proof, the antithesis of science.

[Roo St. Gallus]

Per Edie Brickell...

Philosophy is the talk on a cereal box.
Religion is the smile on a dog.

Philosophy is a walk on the slippery rocks.
Religion is a light in the fog.

I personally like the 'smile on a dog' one.

[Jobar]

Huh. I always heard that as "religion- a lie in a fog."

[dustbin]

I often liken my experience of being a member of a religion (jw) as a marriage gone wrong. You marry a beautiful sexy women with the promise of a wonderful time together. After a couple years you wake up and find out she is wearing a wig as gone of sex as a wooden leg farts and her breath smells. And to make matters worse you cant leave easily.

[Politesse]

I often liken my experience of being a member of a religion (jw) as a marriage gone wrong. You marry a beautiful sexy women with the promise of a wonderful time together. After a couple years you wake up and find out she is wearing a wig as gone of sex as a wooden leg farts and her breath smells. And to make matters worse you cant leave easily.

So is atheism like remaining single your whole life because you are afraid a woman won't meet your standards forever?

[DMB]

No. Atheism is like escaping from prison.

[kennyc]

...a breath of fresh air...

[Daydream]

I love this thread! :D

Religion is like bondage of the mind.

[dustbin]

No atheism is being free to make moral decisions for myself and not look over my shoulder to see if I have broken some rule or other that is imposed by some one else's understanding of an ancient book of myths and legends. It also means that the decisions I make and there consequences are mine.

[Matty]

Per Edie Brickell...

Philosophy is the talk on a cereal box.
Religion is the smile on a dog.

Philosophy is a walk on the slippery rocks.
Religion is a light in the fog.

I personally like the 'smile on a dog' one.


i think, as Jobar says, its Lie in the fog. In the baby spice cover of a few years back she certainly sang it as "light" but i remember her being criticized for it.
i will dig up the CD and take a look.

still kudos for the ref anyway, i agree the smile on a dog bit is the best likening in that song.

[kennyc]

Religion is like a penis, if you mess with it, it gets all worked up and screws you.

[Matty]

So is atheism like remaining single your whole life because you are afraid a woman won't meet your standards forever? atheism is more like a truly open and communicative relationship with someone who loves you for who you are, Sure the brutal honesty and lack of sugary platitudes can be tough at times but you know you'll not be expected to change your life or personality for someone else's spurious subjective reasoning or have unreasonable restrictions placed on what you can and cant do because it is an adult relationship based on honesty.

religion by comparison is more akin to being married to some mentally capricious, psychotically jealous, schizophrenic harridan. There is a degree of excitement in never knowing if she is going to blow you or stab you, but its a tenuous one because one foot wrong on her secret list of irrational does and donts and she'll take you for everything she can without the slightest remorse.

divorce that cunt. do it. she doesnt love you, she just wants to own you.

[Free in Freeport]

Seriously, when I realized I no longer believed, it was anti-climatic. I actually thought I was going to go into a depression, but didn't.

[Jack Willsson]

In the pentecostal church I went to from 18 to my late 20s I had some great friends and I still have some happy memories.

I ain't gonna rat on them just 'cuz I don't believe in "God" any more.

[Matty]

religion is like a plastic bag. Disposable, bad for the global environment, potentially dangerous to those who dont know how to use it properly, can be used as a murderous weapon and above all else should be kept well away from children.

[Jack Willsson]

religion is like a plastic bag. Disposable, bad for the global environment, potentially dangerous to those who dont know how to use it properly, can be used as a murderous weapon and above all else should be kept well away from children.

What do you think constitutes "using religion properly"?

[mood2]

Like a shopping trolley with spiked wheels

[Matty]

religion is like a plastic bag. Disposable, bad for the global environment, potentially dangerous to those who dont know how to use it properly, can be used as a murderous weapon and above all else should be kept well away from children.

What do you think constitutes "using religion properly"?

personally speaking, i think the only valid use is as a subject for the purposes of abstract philosophical discussion,
i guess if needs be as a crutch for personal satisfaction or comfort in times of stress but not at the cost of anyone else's personal satisfaction or comfort.

Certainly not to be taken too seriously or literally, or forced/proselytized onto anyone else (especially dependent children or similar) . Or to be used for personal gain or coercion for mental sexual or physical abuse as tend to be all to common. Or to be used/claimed as factual.

[JamesBannon]

Bullshit served to the 'proles to distract them from the miserable nature of their existence.

[Aupmanyav]

I'm pretty bitter about religion, having had it shoved down my throat for most of my formative years.I wonder why you have not got over it! :)

[Rie]

Religion is like being in chains and hating those things that are human , not to put too fine a point on it. Those who are 'religious' really hate the things of the flesh. Therefore they are deluded.

[Jobar]

Arguing about religion is like arguing if Superman is stronger than the Hulk, or faster than the Flash.

Religion is like a toothache. Losing one's religious faith can be a very painful process. Like a trip to the dentist, it may hurt a lot- but it usually saves you a lot more pain later.

[diana]

Religion is like underwear - Everyone thinks you have to have it, but nobody can give a good reason why.Oh, this one's great.

d

[diana]

It also means that the decisions I make and there consequences are mine.Yes. But they always have been, even when you believed in hellfire everlasting. The difference is, your understanding of the consequences of your actions has changed. Drastically.

d

[Free in Freeport]

Religion is like an old blanket. You think its comforting until you realize how bad it smells.

I guess that could apply to underwear too.

[Free in Freeport]

Religion is like hemmorhoids. Most assholes have one.

[Jobar]

From Robert Heinlein-

"Religion is a crutch for people not strong enough to stand up to the unknown without help. But, like dandruff, most people do have a religion and spend time and money on it and seem to derive considerable pleasure from fiddling with it."

"Theology is never any help; it is searching in a dark cellar at midnight for a black cat that isn't there."

[Jobar]

One of my favorite short poems, by Pulitzer prize-winning poet, Phyllis McGinley:

Ah, snug lie those that slumber
Beneath Conviction's roof.
Their floors are sturdy lumber
Their windows weatherproof.
But I sleep cold forever
And cold sleep all my kind
For I was born to shiver
In the draft from an open mind.

[BWE]

one I wrote:

Gods and heavens all unfold
While you yourself are being sold
By preachers round a water hole
To those who want to gain control

Over body mind heart and soul
In fear that they are growing old
Their bodies that will decompose
So pave the fears with bricks of gold

And keep you in a stranglehold
Of fear that you can only go
To pastures sung about of woe
Sheep for shepherd's crook to mold

Body mind heart and soul
The joys that we can only know
Apart from any friend or foe
We learned about them long ago

Where our thoughts can overflow
From silver cups and drinking bowls
And timeless loves that we stow
In little boxes wrapped in bows

Enjoying time where we forgo
Fear of pleasures down below
Chains of daisies that we hold
As we dance we know it's so

The hours our ours to see no more

[kennyc]

Nice one BWE.

[BWE]

thanks. it sounds nice on guitar but I think I like the piano arrangement better. I should record the two and post them.

[Schneibster]

Actually religion stinks much more than that. More like a toilet that's been used daily and hasn't been flushed in 2000 years.
I dunno. It's still true in many places that if you discover yourself totally down and out, any building with a large cross on it will be a source of some comfort. The price is not monetary usually. That's not a total waste. If someone does that and only requires that their own baggage be heard, it's not all bad.Go here (http://www.susanblackmore.co.uk/Books/Meme%20Machine/mmsynop.html) and search for "altruism trick." This is a primary infection mechanism.

Religion is a mind virus.

[Matty]

Bullshit served to the 'proles to distract them from the miserable nature of their existence.

like. Jim, not IS

:cool:

[BWE]

Actually religion stinks much more than that. More like a toilet that's been used daily and hasn't been flushed in 2000 years.
I dunno. It's still true in many places that if you discover yourself totally down and out, any building with a large cross on it will be a source of some comfort. The price is not monetary usually. That's not a total waste. If someone does that and only requires that their own baggage be heard, it's not all bad.Go here (http://www.susanblackmore.co.uk/Books/Meme%20Machine/mmsynop.html) and search for "altruism trick." This is a primary infection mechanism.

Religion is a mind virus.
I love Susan Blackmore .

13. The altruism trick
A new theory of memetic altruism is proposed. Altruism spreads memes and therefore thrives even at the expense of the genes. Some memes just look like altruism, but whole memeplexes (co-adapted meme-complexes) can use the "altruism trick". Debts, obligations, and bartering are all affected by memes.


I think this is what I said. Exposure to memes are the price you have to pay if you need help that bad. No matter where you go.

[Rie]

Religion is like always having to take your runny nosed little brother along wherever you go.

[Schneibster]

I think this is what I said. Exposure to memes are the price you have to pay if you need help that bad. No matter where you go.On the theory that your memes made you down and out, I'm not entirely comfortable replacing them all under duress. It smells like taking advantage of the underprivileged.