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DMB
22 Jun 2009, 01:58 PM
http://edition.cnn.com/2009/WORLD/europe/06/22/uk.cows.trampling/index.html

I must say I'm not surprised. Cows tend to mob dogs and an owner can get in the way. A mob of cows is bloody scary. I was genuinely frightened once in the Alps when walking with my malamute. The dog was terrified as well.

Ray Moscow
22 Jun 2009, 02:02 PM
Once my wife and I had a herd of small (500 lbs each?) cows/bulls following us while walking in Cornwall. Apparently the owner fed them regularly (I confirmed this later -- he fed them so that they would follow him, so on slaughterhouse day they would be easy to round up).

Chasing them away was not easy, and they are pretty damn big.

So yeah, I could see someone getting hurt or even killed by the things, in the wrong circumstances.

David B
22 Jun 2009, 02:05 PM
David Blunkett got beaten up by some recently.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/8089498.stm

So they are not all bad:D

David

Matty
22 Jun 2009, 02:11 PM
i worked a cow and sheep farm in Cornwall and can safely say that even a gang of young uns, if they are feeling boistrous, can knock you about the place pretty well. When we used to dump the bails of food off the van i'd get knocked about good by the 3year old beef stock whilst i was splitting it up. Used to be like rugby training :)

And yeah, they do get pissed off at the dogs from time to time and WILL have a proper go so being out of the way of the best part of a ton of beef running at high speed with the head down, is probably recommended if you get the choice. There is a reasonable chance you will come off worse in a man vs daisy competition, (unless you are the owner of a bolt gun of course in which case all bets are off).




Eta i heard David Blunkett was to be the new Chelsea manager, they needed someone who know how to hold onto a lead.

Goldie
22 Jun 2009, 04:08 PM
I worked for a ranch for many yrs as a manager/ranch hand. I took care of about 1500 head of the most ornery cattle you can imagine. Most were brangus (brama - angus cross) and charolais. They were the wildest, meanest bunch and anyone would be a fool just to walk in amoungst them without the proper gear and know-how.
In a wild, open range most would just run...but we had a select few cows and bulls that would run down any human on foot. Bastards!

In an enclosed pen... like I said...a "greenhorn" would be an idiot to climb in. They can and do kill people and yes...they HATE dogs. Dogs are their natural enemies... Think wolves / coyotes. A cow is not a good mama unless she can defend her calf from a wolf.

Even with my background I ended up on the wrong end more than once. I had to defend myself fiercely and once...I made a BIG mistake...should have been dead...but got very lucky instead.

Matty
22 Jun 2009, 04:24 PM
heh charolais are known as moody bad tempered bastards IIRC.

Anne
22 Jun 2009, 04:27 PM
keep going guys... I'm feeling less bad about my desire for a burger right now...

Goldie
22 Jun 2009, 05:13 PM
heh charolais are known as moody bad tempered bastards IIRC.

You remember correctly as are angus/brama x's...
I wish one of the cowfolk I worked with could tell the stories. They start in everytime they see me and enjoy telling in a group. They are better at it than I am.
I think they are still a little amazed that I ever did the job...being all of 5'1" and 115 lbs.
I was the only woman in these parts doing the job and one of the last to run on open range (and to run those ornery breeds) Also, I wasn't born /raised into it. I was a Detroit city girl.
I was desperate and lied to get the job.


I still get strangers who want to "shake my hand."

Cath B
22 Jun 2009, 06:05 PM
I saw our family dog threatened by a herd of cows one time. My Dad had her on the lead and they managed to scadoode into the next field in the nick of time.

It was scary!

Goldie
22 Jun 2009, 06:29 PM
I saw our family dog threatened by a herd of cows one time. My Dad had her on the lead and they managed to scadoode into the next field in the nick of time.

It was scary!

It always amazes me when people refer to cattle / cows as big and dumb and lumbering. People see them out there grazing and think they are like a retarded deer or something.
Think again!
They are smart. They are quick!... and they are strong!
Even "sweet" breeds like Herefords can be mean as hell if provoked...or not.

I wanted to scream at people in Yellowstone. They were walking up to the Bison...well... way too damned close... to get pictures. I didn't dare yell to them to get back... Bison aka American Buffalo can be very aggressive. They are wild animals! How stupid people can be!
I did tell one family that it would be wise to use their zoom, instead. Heck! They had kids and were going to walk out to a grazing bull.

Sheesh!

Matty
22 Jun 2009, 06:40 PM
heh. One of the scariest moments i ever had was being introduced to Tyson (what else) the big fucking bull that owned our farm (i say ours, the one i worked on) :) . He was actually pretty well tempered if sometimes a bit curious-pushy and the farmer gave me a 1ft bamboo stick and told me to swat him on the nose if he was getting in my face too much. GTFO> Picture townie me

"Um, right, K. Now i know you are an old hand at this and all that, but you did mean to give me a twig to fend off an aggro bull didnt you, not, say, a fucking tazer or a shotgun? This kiupatan you gave me might be good in a self defence measure against a 15 year old chav, but i doubt if that ton of snorting steak is going to be that impressed with my wrist lock tbqh.

Its NOT a mistake. Fuck. Just trust you? hmmmm okay, well if i dont make it, tell my family i love them and all that for me eh, thanks"


As it happened he was totally right. One swat n the nose was all it took and Big T gave me a wide berth after that. I was always pretty respectful of him and gave him his food promptly so we were friends after that but i really thought i was going to be toast whacking him with a tiny stick.



Bison aka American Buffalo can be very aggressive. which is, if i remember my Guns Germs and Steel correctly , the main reason they weren't succesfully domesticated compared to other species with potential. The other similar examples are onagers and zebras vs horses which had all the other aspects of domesticability, except the temperament and were consequently not tamed on a large scale.

JamesBannon
22 Jun 2009, 07:10 PM
You want gentle in cattle? Try Highland Cattle (the ones you see on Highland Toffee bars). In spite of having big horns, they are amazingly docile.

Goldie
22 Jun 2009, 07:38 PM
You want gentle in cattle? Try Highland Cattle (the ones you see on Highland Toffee bars). In spite of having big horns, they are amazingly docile.

Yea, my neighbor had them. They are sweet and cute as hell. The bulls can be a bit ornery, but even they can be sweet at the right time.

I love the bebes! :D

DMB
22 Jun 2009, 07:47 PM
heh. One of the scariest moments i ever had was being introduced to Tyson (what else) the big fucking bull that owned our farm (i say ours, the one i worked on) :) . He was actually pretty well tempered if sometimes a bit curious-pushy and the farmer gave me a 1ft bamboo stick and told me to swat him on the nose if he was getting in my face too much. GTFO> Picture townie me

"Um, right, K. Now i know you are an old hand at this and all that, but you did mean to give me a twig to fend off an aggro bull didnt you, not, say, a fucking tazer or a shotgun? This kiupatan you gave me might be good in a self defence measure against a 15 year old chav, but i doubt if that ton of snorting steak is going to be that impressed with my wrist lock tbqh.

Its NOT a mistake. Fuck. Just trust you? hmmmm okay, well if i dont make it, tell my family i love them and all that for me eh, thanks"


As it happened he was totally right. One swat n the nose was all it took and Big T gave me a wide berth after that. I was always pretty respectful of him and gave him his food promptly so we were friends after that but i really thought i was going to be toast whacking him with a tiny stick.



Bison aka American Buffalo can be very aggressive. which is, if i remember my Guns Germs and Steel correctly , the main reason they weren't succesfully domesticated compared to other species with potential. The other similar examples are onagers and zebras vs horses which had all the other aspects of domesticability, except the temperament and were consequently not tamed on a large scale.

Bison are now being farmed. I've seen some here in Switzerland. They don't wear cow bells though.

As a slight derail, take a look at this: Cow fighting

WZ3QOYurjLA

Anne
22 Jun 2009, 07:58 PM
bison is good eats.

If you like red meat, that is.

Now, are dairy cows more docile? My MiL grew up on a dairy farm, and I have NEVER heard a story like these...

Matty
22 Jun 2009, 08:24 PM
Bison are now being farmed. I've seen some here in Switzerland. They don't wear cow bells though.yeah i think a better understanding of the herd "politics" has made it possible more recently, but they werent traditionally domesticated, apparently down to a reasonable chance of winding up dead if you tried.

Bison IS good eats, i find it pretty lean, and kinda like venison.

The dairy cows on our farm were pretty docile, but the young 'uns getting grown up for beef were much more boisterous.

Goldie
22 Jun 2009, 08:25 PM
In these parts...bison and elk are raised on ranches for meat.


Dairy cows can be docile, but some of the bulls (Holstein) have a rep for being mean as hell.
Anymore, people AI and mark with a docile gomer bull.

A Gomer or "spotter" is a bull that is still intact, but his penis is either pulled back or re-routed out the side. He wears a roller with ink around his neck and...when he mounts a cow in heat he marks her but cannot inseminate her. She is then brought in for AI (artificial insemination)
Gomer bulls are chosen for their docile personality, because they need to have their roller changed often and they don't want the cows hurt.

Bizzzaro huh????
I used to help with gomer surgeries at the vet clinic.

JamesBannon
22 Jun 2009, 08:28 PM
Poor bull is all I've got to say.

Anne
22 Jun 2009, 08:31 PM
IIRC, the bison being ranched is beefalo--- a hybrid cow/bison mix.

That could be why the sudden farming.

'bison' is shorthand for 'beefalo', I believe true bison is not legal to eat, due to numbers...

Goldie
22 Jun 2009, 08:33 PM
No buffalo, bison is bred and raised for meat here in the NW. You have to have at least a bull for beefalo...a friend raised that... but you can get straight buffalo / bison, here.

Anne
22 Jun 2009, 08:34 PM
hm. learn something every day.

Goldie
22 Jun 2009, 08:37 PM
Yea Bison is the real name / species for the American Buffalo. They are not really buffalo, but actually Bison. Buffalo is a common name, not true.

Anne
22 Jun 2009, 08:38 PM
heh, I knew that--- I meant that they are selling real bison meat.

(I'm from Buffalo--- I know the animals' history--- and that we never had them)

Ray Moscow
22 Jun 2009, 09:41 PM
I forget how many tourists are injured by bison in Yellowstone every year -- but I think it's 30 or 40 on average (the last time I was there).

And most of the injuries come from people walking up to this large, aggressive wild animal to take pictures. People think they're tame, but they just don't see very well -- and (like bears) they don't like to be startled.

JamesBannon
22 Jun 2009, 10:06 PM
Yeah, I don't think I'd approach a Bison herd in its "wild" state. They're a bit over large to start with! I wouldn't like to get charged by a bull or a cow protecting a calf.

TheBear
22 Jun 2009, 11:44 PM
http://edition.cnn.com/2009/WORLD/europe/06/22/uk.cows.trampling/index.html

I must say I'm not surprised. Cows tend to mob dogs and an owner can get in the way. A mob of cows is bloody scary. I was genuinely frightened once in the Alps when walking with my malamute. The dog was terrified as well.
Bulls are even worse!

Goldie
23 Jun 2009, 01:47 AM
Poor bull is all I've got to say.

No argument from me. I always thought it was an awful thing to do to an animal. At best, the poor critter is frustrated. (Maybe better than ending up on someone's plate, tho... which would be the alternative for such a non agressive bull.)

We used to say we were in the sex change business. We also did a "heffer" surgery where we would have to turn a steer into a "hefferrette." However this procedure was medically necessary and saved the steer's life. It was a re-routing of the urethra to the back of the steer so he'd urinate much like a heffer. We did this when the steer had a urinary blockage, which wasn't uncommon.


As I said. Bizzaro world. ;)

Cath B
23 Jun 2009, 06:58 AM
In these parts...bison and elk are raised on ranches for meat.


Dairy cows can be docile, but some of the bulls (Holstein) have a rep for being mean as hell.
Anymore, people AI and mark with a docile gomer bull.

A Gomer or "spotter" is a bull that is still intact, but his penis is either pulled back or re-routed out the side. He wears a roller with ink around his neck and...when he mounts a cow in heat he marks her but cannot inseminate her. She is then brought in for AI (artificial insemination)
Gomer bulls are chosen for their docile personality, because they need to have their roller changed often and they don't want the cows hurt.

Bizzzaro huh????
I used to help with gomer surgeries at the vet clinic.

Always something new to learn on this board!

LoneWolf
23 Jun 2009, 07:46 AM
I was 10 years old and my brother was 8. We went to the deer lease with my dad who loves hunting. My brother and I just liked being outdoors. The owner of the range kept a herd of cattle out there as well. My brother and I used to enjoy watching them and seeing how close we could get. My dad was of the "boys will be boys" mindset and would just bark out an occasional "don't get TOO close boys" and would go back to prepping his gear. The cows always just ignored us.

Until the day we brought out Irish Setter, Amber.

We got out to the range and my brother and Amber and I started playing chase. My dad was over at the truck getting his gear ready. And there were our old buddies the cows. We headed over to them expecting the same nonchalant welcome we always received. But this time they were looking at us as if we were about to BBQ their babies right there on the spot. Actually it was Amber who they were looking at. Amber decided the safest place was right behind my brother and me. Then several of the mother cows began trotting toward us. Then the trot turned into a bit of a charge. All three of us turned around and ran for the truck. Needless to say, Amber was way ahead of us. As I heard them getting closer to us (we were right between them and Amber) my dad fired a shot from his rifle up into the air.

The cattle scattered.

We learned a lesson.

Notta
23 Jun 2009, 02:07 PM
My brothers and I would play a game with our neighborhood bull. It was "Who can get out of the pasture fastest?" That bull would charge anyone who stepped a foot in his pasture. We would split up, one on each side of a fence, jump in the pasture and yell at the bull, and try to get him to chase each of us in turn. We never strayed far from the fence. Looking back, that bull could have knocked down the fence if it hadn't been electrified or if we had gotten him really mad. I was chased down a road by a bull who was less than 5 feet away on the other side of a fence when I was an adult. He was snorting and bellowing, and all because I stood by the fence to look at 'his' cows. He was rather young, and quite territorial.

Puck
24 Jun 2009, 09:55 PM
I knew of a guy who lived on a river that was good fishin'. People would always try to cross the field to get to the river. Finally, he got a fine bull and put up a sign that said, 'you can cross this field if you can out run the bull'.

BWE
24 Jun 2009, 10:20 PM
I was a butcher for almost 10 years.

Jobar
24 Jun 2009, 11:23 PM
Growing up on the dairy farm, the only time we had to worry about the cows was when we took the calves away, usually.

Once, at age 16, we had a cow who had just had her first calf, and we had to train her to start going into the dairy barn to milk her.

Most cows, being herd animals, will follow the lead of the rest; and since we also fed them while milking them, most were very eager to go in the barn for the sweet feed we gave them.

This cow, however, did NOT want to go in the barn. And she was aggressive enough that whacking her over the nose with a stick, our usual method of stopping a cow, had no effect. She'd shoulder us out of the way, and would probably have run right over us if we'd fallen down.

So we had made multiple attempts to get the cow in to milk her, and she'd escape and run across the field. We would chase her back towards the barn, and the whole deal would repeat.

After the fourth or fifth time, I was seriously pissed off. So, when she tried to run past me in a narrow fenced lane, I reached out, grabbed her in her nostrils, and slammed my fist on her eye- and damned if I didn't throw her off her feet! My father and brothers were astonished; and thinking back on it, I am too. That cow weighed 6-700 pounds, and I probably went 150 then. But after that, she never messed with us again.

That story still gets told at family gatherings sometimes, even though the dairy's been shut down for nearly twenty years now. :)

Goldie
24 Jun 2009, 11:32 PM
Sometimes, the super-surge of hormones after the birth of a calf will make the cow so angry and over-protective that...in an enclosed area...she will kill her own calf.
I've seen it. They can be very brutal.

Those cows go to hamburger and if you can rescue the calf, it gets grafted onto a new mom who lost her own calf.

Goldie
24 Jun 2009, 11:39 PM
Sometimes, the super-surge of hormones after the birth of a calf will make the cow so angry and over-protective that...in an enclosed area...she will kill her own calf.
I've seen it. They can be very brutal.

Those cows go to hamburger and if you can rescue the calf, it gets grafted onto a new mom who lost her own calf.

ETA: One of my most favorite "peaceful" things to do is to milk a cow. But, I rarely got to milk a milk / dairy cow...it was usually a beef cow. That takes a bit more know-how. (Believe it or not, I've also milked horses. That's really tough.)
But, to me...on a cold morning...sitting on a stool putting my head to the cow and warming my hands on her soft udder while quietly milking her was such a soothing pleasure that I only came to know as an adult. It never felt like a chore. I miss it.

Jobar
25 Jun 2009, 12:18 AM
Dairy cows- Holsteins, Ayrshires, Jerseys, Guernseys- do tend to be much more docile than beef cattle, and of course being handled daily by people they get fairly gentle. Even so, it was rare to find one that could actually be petted; in all the years we ran the dairy, I only recall a dozen or so that would allow you to walk up to them in the open field and touch them. We always had to clamp their heads in stanchions to get them to be still enough to milk them- and some were definitely meaner than others!

Another story- when I was too young to actually do the milking, but could still do various chores like feeding, my father had a seriously mean cow named Alice. She was well known for kicking you if you walked too close behind her. One day my father was trying to put the milking machine on her, and she kept pawing at it with her back hoof. We had a set of leg irons, which my father put on her, but she still had enough slack to knock off the machine. My dad got in beside her and tightened the chain until her back legs were forced tightly together; at that point, he stepped back and pronounced "Let's see you kick now, you son-of-a-bitch!"

At which Alice came off the floor with both back feet and kicked my dad in the face, knocking loose several teeth.

A cousin of mine was working with him that day; instead of trying first aid, he panicked, jumped in the truck, and roared off to get an ambulance, leaving me to help my dad, who was not unconscious, but had been knocked silly. I got him to a seat, got him calmed down, brought him a clean towel and some ice; by the time my mother came to see what was happening, I even had found the two teeth which had been knocked out. They hustled him off to the doctor, where he was treated for concussion and had the teeth replaced- as I recall, one of them successfully.

Not long afterward, my dad purchased a 'cow clamp' which fits across the top of the cow's hips, and when tightened immobilizes the muscles which move her back legs. Before that episode, he considered them too expensive...

BWE
25 Jun 2009, 03:07 AM
we used to co cowboarding. When the pens were pretty full or overnight full, theyd shit all over so the cement ground was slick. We'd grab a tail ans swat the cow in the ass and see how far we could waterski behind her in our rubbber boots.

Garrett
25 Jun 2009, 03:16 AM
Great stories!

Never had cows, but I used to ride goats. Grab the horns for dear life! One in particular knew to slam sideways into the fencing to dislodge the rider, so you'd have to lift the correct leg at just the right time to avoid getting hurt.

Zygote
25 Jun 2009, 06:06 AM
Pardon the derail, but this is the first thing that crossed my mind when I saw the title of this thread:

Cows With Guns (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aPhWfSeMYHA)

BWE
25 Jun 2009, 06:08 AM
a bunch of embedding code?

BWE
25 Jun 2009, 06:09 AM
http://www.youtube.com/v/aPhWfSeMYHA

Zygote
25 Jun 2009, 06:37 AM
Thanks, BWE. I've cleaned mine up but yours is still better.

Faerie
25 Jun 2009, 06:45 AM
Great stories!

Never had cows, but I used to ride goats. Grab the horns for dear life! One in particular knew to slam sideways into the fencing to dislodge the rider, so you'd have to lift the correct leg at just the right time to avoid getting hurt.

Wild Donkeys on my childhood farm. They'd be quite willing to stand and allow us to touch them, so all stroking we'd manuevre ourselves onto its back, upon which the rest of the children would stand back and the one that was momentarily on its back a second ago would go flying legs over arms over head into the bushes. And the whole process would repeat itself. I'm sure the donkeys had a blast bucking off eager kids and having them limp home at the end of the day. That we never seriously got injured is still an amazing miracle to me.

Anne
25 Jun 2009, 01:22 PM
that's a female the singer keeps referring to as 'he'.

/pedantic.

DMB
25 Jun 2009, 01:30 PM
that's a female the singer keeps referring to as 'he'.

/pedantic.

Yes, that annoyed me too. But perhaps the song was recorded before the animation was done.

Anne
25 Jun 2009, 01:33 PM
meh--- cow alone is a female term.

DMB
25 Jun 2009, 01:36 PM
meh--- cow alone is a female term.

Oh. I know it is where I come from, but I thought that some Americans used it as a generic term for any cattle.

Anne
25 Jun 2009, 01:37 PM
just because some do, doesn't mean it's right.

It's cattle, or cows and bulls.

Goldie
25 Jun 2009, 03:16 PM
just because some do, doesn't mean it's right.

It's cattle, or cows and bulls.

Cows, bulls, heffers and steers... all cattle, but yes "Cows" is sometimes used to refer to cattle. Most male cattle are steers. They are born bulls, but they don't stay that way long.

Goldie
25 Jun 2009, 03:24 PM
just because some do, doesn't mean it's right.

It's cattle, or cows and bulls.

Cows, bulls, heffers and steers... all cattle, but yes "Cows" is sometimes used to refer to cattle. Most male cattle are steers. They are born bulls, but they don't stay that way long.

Elk and Moose are also refered to as cows and bulls.

Ray Moscow
25 Jun 2009, 03:41 PM
I prefer the biblical term "milch kine".

Goldie
25 Jun 2009, 03:43 PM
Critters of the bovine kind! :p

Zebulon
25 Jun 2009, 04:30 PM
That story still gets told at family gatherings sometimes, even though the dairy's been shut down for nearly twenty years now. :)

"That reminds me of the time that Jobar punched out a cow..." :rolling:

Zygote
25 Jun 2009, 05:12 PM
The term "cowboy" as opposed to "steerboy" may help perpetuate the use of "cows" instead of "cattle."

Cath B
25 Jun 2009, 05:55 PM
I prefer the biblical term "milch kine".

What he said.

DMB
25 Jun 2009, 07:16 PM
just because some do, doesn't mean it's right.

It's cattle, or cows and bulls.

Cows, bulls, heffers and steers... all cattle, but yes "Cows" is sometimes used to refer to cattle. Most male cattle are steers. They are born bulls, but they don't stay that way long.

We Brits don't call them "steers". They're "bullocks". Not to be confused with "ballocks" or "bollocks", part of the male anatomy.

Goldie
26 Jun 2009, 12:47 AM
just because some do, doesn't mean it's right.

It's cattle, or cows and bulls.

Cows, bulls, heffers and steers... all cattle, but yes "Cows" is sometimes used to refer to cattle. Most male cattle are steers. They are born bulls, but they don't stay that way long.

We Brits don't call them "steers". They're "bullocks". Not to be confused with "ballocks" or "bollocks", part of the male anatomy.

Hell! Ya learn something new everyday. :) Are heffers called heffers?

Matty
26 Jun 2009, 03:14 AM
yeah but spelt heifers ;)

Jobar
26 Jun 2009, 03:29 AM
That story still gets told at family gatherings sometimes, even though the dairy's been shut down for nearly twenty years now. :)

"That reminds me of the time that Jobar punched out a cow..." :rolling:

The first time I saw Blazing Saddles, when Mongo punched out the horse, I thought of it. :D

Goldie
26 Jun 2009, 03:41 AM
yeah but spelt heifers ;)

Well...I have no idea what that means.:o
We have heffers or heifers... but there are 1st calf heffers and 2nd calf heffers...after that...they are cows.

BWE
26 Jun 2009, 03:58 AM
The term "cowboy" as opposed to "steerboy" may help perpetuate the use of "cows" instead of "cattle."

If someone said they were a steerboy, the first thing I'd do is say I'm so sorry.

Goldie
26 Jun 2009, 04:11 AM
Before you call 'em a cowboy...you'd better see 'em ride. ;)

DMB
26 Jun 2009, 05:38 AM
In the UK, "cowboys" are incompetent builders.

BWE
26 Jun 2009, 05:49 AM
I've ridden a few cows.

Goldie
26 Jun 2009, 07:20 AM
:rolling:I've ridden a few cows.

My Cowboy

http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t228/lilcarolyn01/engage81.jpg

BWE
26 Jun 2009, 07:24 AM
I was being a bit more literal than that. :) I meant real four legged mooing cows with udders and hooves. :p

Eudaimonist
26 Jun 2009, 07:57 AM
I worked for a ranch for many yrs as a manager/ranch hand. I took care of about 1500 head of the most ornery cattle you can imagine. Most were brangus (brama - angus cross) and charolais. They were the wildest, meanest bunch and anyone would be a fool just to walk in amoungst them without the proper gear and know-how.
In a wild, open range most would just run...but we had a select few cows and bulls that would run down any human on foot. Bastards!

That sounds like udder chaos!

Garrett
26 Jun 2009, 08:09 AM
:rolling:

BWE
26 Jun 2009, 08:18 AM
Goldie,
I wrote:
I was being a bit more literal than that. :) I meant real four legged mooing cows with udders and hooves. :p

Now that I look at it, I can see how you might take my statement to mean something else. :p

PS. You and your cowboy make a handsome couple.

Anne
26 Jun 2009, 03:57 PM
In the UK, "cowboys" are incompetent builders.

cowboy is also slang here for a loudmouth jerk.

BWE
26 Jun 2009, 05:50 PM
Jeeze. I'm a cowboy everywhere. :p

Goldie
26 Jun 2009, 11:06 PM
Goldie,
I wrote:
I was being a bit more literal than that. :) I meant real four legged mooing cows with udders and hooves. :p

Now that I look at it, I can see how you might take my statement to mean something else. :p

PS. You and your cowboy make a handsome couple.

:) Thanks. That was 28 yrs ago.:o

Deacon Doubtmonger
27 Jun 2009, 05:35 PM
He wears a roller with ink around his neck and...when he mounts a cow in heat he marks her but cannot inseminate her.
Oh, no -- tell me you're not giving fundies ideas on how to keep their teenage sons in line ... :p

Pardon the derail, but this is the first thing that crossed my mind when I saw the title of this thread:

Cows With Guns (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aPhWfSeMYHA)
And let us not forget the immortal Steve Martin's "Cows in Trouble." (http://stevemartin.com/world_of_steve/print/cows_in_trouble.php) And speaking of Mr. Martin:

Dairy cows- Holsteins, Ayrshires, Jerseys, Guernseys- do tend to be much more docile than beef cattle, and of course being handled daily by people they get fairly gentle.
Gather 'round, heathen kiddies, for DD's True Holstein Story:

Mrs. D :love: :love: :love: and I were once on vacation at a dairy farm/bed-and-breakfast in Vermont. We stepped out at dusk to enjoy the country air and found ourselves near an electric fence behind which were 25 Holsteins due to calve soon. So just to be funny, I decide to spoof Martin's Tonight Show bit "Comedy for Dogs" (http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/dbd3c7c088/steve-martin-comedy-for-dogs-from-classicstandupfan) with "Comedy for Cows" -- and begin reciting a Garrison Keillor "News From Lake Wobegon" monologue on obstreperous Holsteins. Again, I was just joking around ... but within five minutes all 25 bovine mommies-to-be stop their grazing and begin watching me raptly. And stay that way for the whole 15 minutes of the monologue.

Mosquitos are feasting on us both, the farm family looks on from inside the house and knows not what to make of these wackos from the big city ... but it was all too strange and enjoyable for me to stop; no comedian ever wants to lose a captive audience ... Good thing cows can't actually laugh, or I might have induced them all.

Before you call 'em a cowboy...you'd better see 'em ride. ;)
Then keep in mind Martin's "Turtleboy" (split into two parts on YouTube -- anyone tell I'm a big fan?):

Part 1 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F_TfY6oAIqc)
Part 2 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jrNr10xr1iw)

You and your cowboy make a handsome couple.
What BWE said! :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy:

Pendaric
27 Jun 2009, 05:43 PM
just because some do, doesn't mean it's right.

It's cattle, or cows and bulls.

Cows, bulls, heffers and steers... all cattle, but yes "Cows" is sometimes used to refer to cattle. Most male cattle are steers. They are born bulls, but they don't stay that way long.

We Brits don't call them "steers". They're "bullocks". Not to be confused with "ballocks" or "bollocks", part of the male anatomy.

Hell! Ya learn something new everyday. :) Are heffers called heffers?

I thought you farm types referred to them as 'the female I lost my virginity with'. :D

DMB
27 Jun 2009, 06:01 PM
I thought that would be a sheep, goat or bitch. :confused:

Goldie
27 Jun 2009, 06:24 PM
I thought that would be a sheep, goat or bitch. :confused:

Thank you.

REAL cowboys and girls take good care of their critters.

That's for them darn sheep herders. ;)

DMB
27 Jun 2009, 06:54 PM
I was rather thinking of the size discrepancy. :D

Goldie
27 Jun 2009, 07:53 PM
I was rather thinking of the size discrepancy. :D

Yea...I thought of that. Wouldn't work would it.:p